New Year

This time of your always gets me reflecting, as it does most people. Another year is wrapping up, and a new one is on the horizon. I love new beginnings - setting goals, starting a new schedule, looking forward. But I also think it is important that before I do so I think back to 2012 because it has been a really, really good year.

2012 was the year of change and challenge for our family. Lydia was born at the tail end of 2011, and the first couple weeks with her were wonderful. David and I were both home all the time and had no worries or time constraints. We could enjoy our newborn baby, get some rest and have fun during the Christmas season. But as 2012 began we had to arrange for babysitters, try to get Lydia on a schedule, crack open our textbooks and start our last semester of graduate school. January through April were quite simply a blur. I felt I got to enjoy moments with Lydia that I will cherish forever, but in general our lives were pretty crazy. We put our heads down, did our best and in May both graduated in the presence of our proud families.

But graduating was only the beginning. Within a week we had moved back "home" and a whole new set of obstacles awaited us. I was blessed to take the summer off of working and enjoyed pool days with my baby as David studied constantly for the Bar Exam. It was difficult to feel cheated out of the "light at the end of the tunnel".  I thought everything would be different - that David would be able to be around for all of the family festivities and vacations. But in a lot of ways it felt like more of the same; except I had the advantage of being surrounded by family. Over the summer I struggled with my identity as a wife and mother and constantly worried about David's elusive first job.

Being the do-er that I am, I decided I would work in the fall in order to support our family's small financial needs. I was so unsure about starting work again, but as it turned out I loved it! As I began teaching and engaging my mind I felt I was better all around and I legitimately enjoyed each day with Lydia and David. However, there was always the question haunting my mind... What were we doing? What was our future going to look like? In November (right after Thanksgiving) David got his job, and in perfect timing too. We have had the opportunity to enjoy the holidays without any burden of work and it has been truly amazing. We knew it was an opportunity that we would probably never have again and so we did our best to pack each day full of memories and intentional moments.

Looking back, I realize that I spent a lot of 2012 waiting - actively and (mostly) patiently waiting that is. I have learned so much about myself and have been challenged to relinquish the lie that I am in control. I have learned to be content in the present rather than relying on exciting anticipation of the future to be joyful. I have been taught the importance of thankfulness and because of it I wake up each day with a heart full of gratitude to all that I have an all of the love that surrounds me.

I am excited for 2013, and naturally I am nervous. We are still in a time of transition and I know that David working 50 hours a week while I work 25 will not be easy to get used to. But our goals and direction are now more clear and we are ready to work hard so that we can begin to create our own home for our little family. The years truly go by faster and faster; and now I realize that with kids it seems the world spins twice the rate it used to. As we ring in the New Year tonight I hope it bring with it just as many challenges, blessings, and opportunities that 2012 did. And I pray that it will be a good year for you too!

Our Breastfeeding Story: Chapter 2

We made it to a year! If you followed my story once Lydia was born, then you know that our breastfeeding journey hasn't been an easy one. But as I nursed her during her first birthday last weekend I couldn't help but be proud and so, so happy that we pushed through.

The American Association of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding until a year old, so I knew from the beginning that this was my ultimate goal. Knowing that there were so many benefits to Lydia helped me to get to this point, but it also got a whole lot easier after we introduced solids. Months 6 to 12 were a wonderful chapter in our story. As Lydia began to explore foods and gain sustenance and energy from them I felt as though I were free! Go shopping for a few hours with my mom and sister? Sure! She can just eat some yogurt :) Let Daddy take care of the bedtime routine while I take a much needed break? Absolutely! She can eat a healthy snack before bed and be just fine. I didn't realize how constrained I had felt when Lydia relied solely on me for her nutrition until she no longer did so. There are wonderful and beautiful aspects of being truly needed by your baby; but I won't lie - there are perks of them gaining independence as well.

Another thing that immensely helped to make this chapter more enjoyable was night weaning! Right around 10 months Lydia began sleeping through the night all on her own, and even better, during the nights when she did wake up she allowed David to comfort her back to sleep rather than demanding to nurse. I am aware that we are pretty spoiled in this area - and I know that for me having full nights of rest has helped me to stay purely positive about continuing to breastfeed.

During months 6 to 12, nursing became a source of enjoyment, rest and comfort for both Lydia and I. Now that I am on this side of her first birthday I am simply excited and happy so watch Lydia grow and up, learn and continue to gain independence. But there was definitely a time (around months 9 and 10) when I was sad to see my baby quickly slipping into toddler-hood. I cherished the moments when she would lay still in my lap, look into my eyes, and give me big (now toothy) smiles. It was kind of the best of both worlds in that she didn't completely rely on me for everything anymore, but I still felt very special and important to her.

Physically, breastfeeding is now a breeze for us. No more pain, or engorgement and we have both gotten the hang of nursing in public. I don't have to worry about covering up or what I am going to wear because everything just feels like second nature at this point. Somedays I want so badly to give up the nursing bras (I never did find ones that I loved), but other than that nursing a baby doesn't affect my life in the huge way that it did when Lydia was a newborn. As I continue to lose weight (beyond what I gained when pregnant), I remain thankful that breastfeeding burns extra calories. However, since I am not the sole provider of Lydia's calories I no longer have an insatiable appetite - things are more predictable and I feel like I eat like a normal person these days.

Already I can tell that we are beginning to turn a corner. Before Lydia's first birthday I gave no thought to weaning whatsoever. Ideally, Lydia will wean on her own whenever she is ready. Currently - she is driving me nuts. All she wants when she is around me is to nurse, and it makes her a lot more fussy in general. When I am out of the picture Lydia is a perfectly behaved, happy baby, but lately she has been extra needy around me. I know this could be due to tons of things - teething, growing, being sick, our schedules being nuts due to holidays. As usual I have faith that once the semester begins in mid-January and I am away from Lydia 25 hours a week things will figure themselves out. My guess is that she will gradually begin to want to nurse less and less as I won't be around her when she naturally wants it.

All in all - I can definitely say now that I am a breastfeeding advocate. Not one that looks down on anyone else's own personal decisions; just one that really wants to encourage any mama out there who desires to breastfeed. My sisters-in-law and I have joked that we would like "Livestrong" type bracelets that we could wear around in support of breastfeeders. We want to give high fives to the women who nurse in public - whose baby's long legs extend beyond their laps. Sometimes I get looks when I nurse a baby who just toddled her way over to me, pulled at my shirt and said "nuh, nuh". But that is just fine with me. I really have loved our journey and neither of us are ready to be finished just yet.

Merry Christmas Eve

I hope that you are having a wonderful Christmas Eve, wherever you are and whoever you are with. I apologize for the silence around here lately; there was Lydia's birthday party, then Christmas shopping, then I got a stomach bug and slept literally all day Wednesday! Then, on Thursday David surprised me by taking me to the Nutcracker for Christmas, and on Friday morning Lydia and I left for Chicago to bake cookies with my aunts, cousins, sister and mom.

It has been a wonderful Christmas season thus far (other than the being sick part), and I am excited to spend tonight and tomorrow with more family. I just adore Christmas traditions and I love that this time of year always reminds me to be thankful for all of the blessings in my life.

When I have a few more minutes I hope to post about our Christmas traditions, and soon I will be sharing adorable birthday photos with you!

Have a Merry Christmas, full of joy and peace!

One.

Our baby is one year old. She is so happy, so funny, so much work, and so much fun. This past Sunday, on her birthday, we celebrated with family, friends and chocolate cupcakes. It was a blast, and Lydia Grace loved her big day. I marveled the whole time at how much love Lydia is surrounded by, and it was surreal to observe my baby girl acting all grown up. Now, for the last of the monthly updates!

Stats: Lydia weights 19 pounds, 6 ounces and is 29.5 inches long. She has grown 10 inches and gained 12 pounds in the past year! Her measurements for height, weight and head circumference put her right in the 50th percentile. She is perfect. Lydia has 2 bottom teeth, 2 top teeth, and her auburn-ish hair is beginning to thicken up. She is still kinda chubby (especially with her round belly!) but her proportions are definitely becoming more toddler-like as she moves constantly.

Eating: At her first birthday party Lydia scarfed down and entire chocolate cupcake with chocolate icing (made by her great grandma). A lot of people were surprised, but not David and I. We know that this girl LOVES to eat. We are so fortunate to have a baby who loves all food - from blueberries, to green beans, to spaghetti to cupcakes. Every now and then Lydia will turn her nose up at a banana or some chicken, but she usually rejects food because she is finished with being confined by her high chair. She usually eats breakfast, lunch and dinner, along with a snack after each nap. See the Heaven-sent Baby Items section for some of our favorite snacks!

Now that she has teeth eating is obviously so much easier on all of us. She can take bites, and has learned to chew up her food before swallowing. There are still times when she gags or spits things out, but she is clearly very much in control of things in her mouth.

Along with eating solids Lydia is still nursing 5-6 times a day. She nurses frequently in the mornings, and then her feedings trail off as the day wears on. We may start supplementing with cow's milk at meal times, but are definitely in no rush to wean. To be honest, I cherish the times that she will lay on my lap and nurse because it gives us both a rest from her craziness!

Sleeping: Lydia's sleeping patterns are great. We still have a wonderful bedtime routine, and she sleeps from 7:45-6:30 every night. Waking up early is a little rough - but next semester both David and I will have to leave for work around 7:30 so we all have to get used to it. Lydia takes fluctuates between taking one and two naps a day. Generally, she sleeps for 2 1/2-3 hours each day - so if her morning nap is long then she won't take a second one, whereas if the first one only lasts an hour and a half, she is sleepy again by 2:30 or 3.  David is the person who can most consistently get her to sleep. Sometimes I have trouble, and other people usually have no luck. I am definitely nervous for her to be away from home 5 days a week next semester (I will be teaching 7:30-12:30 each day), but I figure that she will adjust and her naps will work themselves out.

What she loves: Moving! Crawling, walking, climbing, and dancing. She is really starting to enjoy music and tv (not that she watches much), and she LOVES books. Obviously she loves to eat, and she adores our extended family these days. It is so cool to see her reach for her aunts, uncles, and grandparents even when I am holding her.

What she hates: Diaper changes. She screams!! Lydia does not like being constrained when she wants to move which means sometimes she throws fits in the car seat, or the shopping cart. She hates being told no - and has thrown a couple tantrums this past month. In general she is super sweet and eager to please; but she is also independent and smart so she has her own opinions too.

  
Personality/Milestones: As is probably clear from above Lydia is extremely mobile. She can stand up from sitting rather than just pull herself up using objects, and she can climb up and down stairs. She has finally started to clap! And sing, and dance.

Lydia says many words, which translate to "daddy", "dog", "hot", "nurse", "nose", and "Josh". All of the sounds aren't perfect, but she is pretty consistent with all of them so we feel that they are words with meaning. She also makes the signs for "more", "eat" and "all done".

 
Heaven-sent baby items: As promised, below are some of our favorite snacks. For meals she eats what we eat in general, but having snacks handy is always useful.

Food pouches - I wish I had thought of these! Lydia refuses pureed food, unless it is in one of these convenient, mess-free, feed-yourself pouches. Lydia eats one of these a day, and we always have an extra in the diaper bag.

Annie's graham crackers and cheese crackers - It may be silly, but I feel good that these snacks have all natural ingredients and are made with organic wheat (whatever that means...). She still gets goldfish and animal crackers some of the time, but I like that she has snacks that are all her own too.

Archer farms fruit strips - These are somewhat sticky, but are much cleaner than most other fruit options. Lydia LOVES these things, and they are all fruit so that is a plus.

Words from Daddy: It is hard to put the past 12 months into words.  There have been so many ups and downs, but everything that I've experienced has made me more excited about the future.  Each month being a father means more and more to me as my role gets bigger and bigger.  I'm disappointed that as I start my new job at the beginning of the year I'm going to spend way less time with Lydia, but I can't wait to see what the next year brings!

To echo what David said, it is so difficult to put this first year into words. It has been the best year of my life by far and I have grown so much with becoming a mother. Each day with Lydia is truly a joy. I am so blessed to be entrusted as her caregiver and teacher. I truly can't imagine my life without her!

7 Snapshots Saturday - Flashback

I figured out how to add more photos! I found the helpful article here.

Tomorrow my baby turns 1. So today I will post 7 of my favorite pictures from the last year (it was hard to pick only 7!!) because this week I am allowing myself time to reminisce. I am excited for Lydia's birthday, but it is hard to come to grips with how time has flown by.

I hope to post pictures from her party tomorrow... but mainly at this point I am hoping we can have the party. We brought Lydia to the doctor this morning and she has a double ear infection :( Here is to hoping she feels much better by tomorrow morning.

Now, onto the adorable pictures!

The day she was born. You can read her birth story here, and this talks about how I was feeling a year ago today - by due date!

 I can't explain how much I love this photo... I loved our little family's first Christmas.

This is one of my favorite pictures of all time! She was so tiny, and chubby and I loved going on walks with her.

The Easter hat! Click here to see more Easter pictures.

I loved Lydia's 6 month photos taken by our friend, Meagan White. It was a REALLY HOT July day, but she did great and I love looking back to when she was so chubby.

I don't even know how old Lydia was in this photo - somewhere between 4 and 7 months?? But I love it and her face just cracks me up.

And for this year's Christmas photo! What a crazy jump from the first one - she is walking all over, climbing stairs and is just so big and so much fun.

Thanks for taking the trip down memory lane with me. Stay tuned for her 12 month update, details about her party, and another chapter of our breastfeeding journey :)

Crafting

I don't do very many crafty things, but for Lydia's birthday I decided I wanted to add personal touches and keep things cheap by making little things - like a birthday hat, a banner, a tutu and hairbow, and cupcake toppers. I am excited to see how everything comes together, and I hope to get some good pictures and write a post with links to the tutorials I used. So far everything has been really easy, and I love making things!! I may have to keep it up... I think sewing some stockings will be next

7 snapshots... or not

Apparently I have shared too many photos with you. I am out of space!! Google has informed me that if I want to show you more adorable pictures of Lydia I have to pay some money, and I am not sure if I want to do that or not.

The alert says something like if the photos are of a certain size or smaller they don't count against my memory, but I am not technologically savvy and thus haven't figured out how to request that the photos be uploaded at a smaller resolution.

Any advice would be much appreciated! And in the meantime I am going to try to figure it out - or hand over the 30 bucks.

Lately....

Lately David and I have been really busy with lots of awesome things, like planning for Lydia's birthday, looking for a new car and putting up Christmas trees with our family.

Lately I have been getting nervous about working 20 hours a week next semester.

Lately we have been dreaming about our someday house and been marveling over God's provision in our life.

Lately I have been catching myself daydreaming about this time last year when Lydia was rolling around in my belly and I was anxiously awaiting her arrival.

Lately I have been forgetting to write, and I have realized how much more full my mind feels when I don't get things out.

Tantrum

Today Lydia had her first tantrum. It really wasn't that bad, and we were at home. But still... I thought I had at least 6 more months until we had to figure out discipline!

It has been obvious lately that Lydia has her own opinion, and she isn't afraid to express it. She doesn't like to be told no and a lot of the time she will make a face or raise her voice for a second. But today she took her protests to a whole new level.

Lydia stuck her hand in my cup of coffee (we were somewhat already battling over this...), so I calmly said ,"No ma'am" and decided to move it to the counter. As soon as I stood up and started walking away the yelling began. Lydia was standing there, clenching her fists, yelling at the top of her lungs and shaking while her face quickly turned red. I had no idea what to do... So I proceeded to ignore her. After a few minutes the yelling turned into sobbing and big tears began rolling down her cheeks. I moved a little closer, looked at her and asked her to calm down. The crying continued for ten minutes! Then I picked her up and distracted her with something.

I am not sure where to go from here. Lydia is generally very well behaved, but today I got a wake up call that it is time for David and I to devise a plan on how we will handle these types of things in the future. As always, there are tons of opinions and strategies, and as usual being consistent and united is the most important thing. She just seems so young!! I guess my little Lydia is growing up.

7 Snapshots - Christmastime is Here

We had a weekend full of Christmas festivities! It was very busy, but also wonderful. It is so strange to think about how our situation a year ago compares to the one we are in today - A year ago we were taking finals, decorating a tiny little tree in our apartment in Lexington, and preparing for a baby. Now David and I are both home most of the time, hanging out with tons of family and enjoying our daughter who is walking everywhere!

All of these pictures were taken by my mother-in-law. She watches Lydia a couple times a week and inevitably photo shoots just happen :)

 On Sunday we all went over to decorate gingerbread houses and the tree - a tradition!

Lydia Grace is sooo big! And adorable, and sweet.