Post-Partum Update: 8 Months

I have been putting off writing this post for about a week. For so many months I was able to proudly say how much baby weight I had lost and how I was fitting into more and more of my old clothes. However, in the past 2 months I have gone from being a little bit discouraged to being very discouraged at times. Not only am I not getting into better shape - but I am gaining some weight back again. And it really isn't all about the weight... I just don't love how I look and feel these days. I have definitely plateaued in getting back into shape after baby and since I am all about honesty on this blog I thought I should share this side of things too.

For a while I was getting good at making excuses - We were on vacation, Lydia started nursing less so I wasn't burning as many calories, I was starting jobs so I was stressed. But the truth is I have developed a terrible diet. When we moved to NKY I was in the glorious stage of being able to eat whatever I wanted and still losing weight. Up here we have access to a lot of junk food via our parents that we never kept in our own apartment. We also eat out a lot more (again, with the family) and this is another habit which David and I stayed far away from when we were in Lexington. So the combination of a huge appetite, super fast metabolism and access to junk food led to some bad habits for me. Just to clarify, I don't eat fast food every day or anything, but I also don't eat as much fruit or yogurt that I used to, and the amount of salt, sugar and ice cream that I consume has drastically increased from 4 months ago.

In the past few months I have come to terms with the fact that my eating habits aren't great and just like any other time in my life when I wasn't happy with my body, I just decided I would work out more. And I have been! I teach aerobics 2-3 times a week (which includes classes from weight lifting to circuit training to Zumba), and then usually I walk or jog at least twice a week. I feel my body getting stronger for sure, and my cardio endurance is getting a lot better too. About a month ago I decided to randomly go for a jog one day - and I ran 2.5 miles no problem! Since then I have been working on running this same distance and trying to increase my speed a little bit, but I have been so surprised that something which I hated so much pre-pregnancy is now a workout that I really enjoy. It is crazy how pregnancy and birth can change everything about your body.

So this is where my frustration comes in, I think. In the past working out more has always worked. It has always gotten me in better shape and helped me to lose any weight that I wanted to. But this time, it isn't working. And no wonder! I know that I can't have a flat stomach if I eat ice cream 4 times a week and choose to drink Coke instead of water. The change has to come in my diet, along with my exercise routine.

And that is where I am now. For the first time in my life (other than when I returned from Chile and had gained 20 pounds...) I am going to intentionally improve the way I eat. Mainly for me this will mean restriction from empty calories and trying to add in the foods that I know are good for me. What I mean by this is that I am not going to go on some crazy diet where I count calories and take out all of the carbs in my diet. I know that I can eat things that are higher in fat and carbs (like cheese, milk, and cereal) as long as they also are nutritious and get to a healthy weight. What I can't do is eat Oreos, Fritos and white bread. I also want to make yogurt a staple in my diet again, as well as make sure that I eat fruit and vegetables twice a day. I plan on still eating the things I really enjoy (ice cream! pizza! Skyline!), but limiting the frequency of these treats. Another thing that I am really going to try is cutting out all red meat (with the exception of the aforementioned Skyline chili), because I know that chicken and fish are much healthier alternatives. Also, David is up for me experimenting with some vegetarian dinners which I am excited about.

All of this is common sense, and I am sorry if you are bored. But maybe after you have a baby you will struggle with the same thing. Everything changed about my body, and for a while I had to just focus on consuming as many calories as I could for nursing purposes. But now, Lydia's needs have changed and so have mine. I am left with some bad habits, but just like all habits they can be changed and transformed into good ones again. It is hard to be in a place where I feel so distant from being pregnant, yet still dealing with the affects that it had on my body. It has been difficult to not compare myself to other mommies (she only had her baby 6 months ago, and she is so skinny already!!) because I really do know that all of us are different. All I can do is focus on being healthy again and regaining a perspective on food which is right. And of course remember that in the end my body is awesome and I am so thankful for all that it accomplished.