Today Lydia's youngest uncle, Josh, is 10 years old! It is so hard to
believe my little brother is 10 already... I remember the day he was
born! Happy Birthday, buddy!
Monday, April 16, 2012
A year ago today.
A year ago today was the day we found out I was pregnant. You can read my reaction to this news here. Needless to say, I was really, really scared. This wasn't at all the emotion I thought I would feel when I found out I was pregnant... someday, far away in the future.
But,
when that day was 3 weeks before finals of my 2nd of 4 semesters of graduate school
when that week was more than a year before David would be finished with law school
when that day was who knows how long before we would have a real income
I was scared.
I felt like David and I, well particularly I, had messed up somehow. I felt irresponsible, nervous, embarrassed... so many negative things all at once. It was so bizarre and looking back at that reaction I see how much have grown in my faith and how much my perspective has changed. And I am now sure that everything happens for a reason, at its perfect time, even if we think it is the worst timing possible.
Just about everyday David and I turn to each other and ask, "What was our life like before her?" We honestly cannot remember the feeling of not having Lydia Grace in our world. As my pregnancy progressed one of the things that I was most nervous about was the weight of the fact that our child will be around for our whole lives. I was anxious about my relationship with my husband changing so deeply and I was afraid that I would somehow feel cramped by this new, always present companion in my life. But now, truly, I cannot imagine life without her. Every morning I anticipate the time when she will wake up and smile at me; I look forward to bath time when she kicks like a maniac; I dream about the vacations and memories that we will make together someday. My heart is so full when I think about my daughter that I don't understand how it didn't feel empty before she was with us.
I also see every single day how much becoming a mom has made me grow and mature as a person, and as a follower of Jesus. This is kind of a whole other post in and of itself, but in short, having a baby has challenged me to be completely selfless and it has also forced me to be complete vulnerable. Neither of these attributes come easily to me - especially the vulnerability. But over the past year I have learned to accept and ask for help from the people around me. I have learned that I am in no way in control of so many things and Lydia has opened up my heart to love more deeply than I ever thought possible. A few weeks ago one of my best friends wrote me a note where she commented that I seem so relaxed as a mommy; like it was what I was made to do. What a compliment! When I read that the tears welled up because it is exactly how I feel and I am so glad that this joy and peace that I feel shows on the outside too.
Most importantly, my faith in God has grown so much over the past year. I truly believe in His plan and timing now, and I have complete trust that He will always be there to provide for our family and to help David and I as we go through hard times. Only with the Lord have we overcome the obstacles of this past year - and we are all so very blessed because of those challenges.
A year ago today my life forever changed. I had no idea at the time all of the ways in which carrying a baby, birthing a baby, and caring for a baby would affect me. And I am so excited because I know that this journey has just begun!
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Seven Snapshots Sunday
How is it Sunday already? This week just flew by... probably because it was insanely busy. I proctored an exam on Monday, which meant I graded all day Tuesday, which meant I didn't start on my Friday homework until Wednesday - you get the idea. But it all got finished and now we are on the brink of starting our second to last week of classes ever!
Here are some cute pictures of our girl - she is getting SO big lately! I thought that I would feel a big transition at 3 months, but it has definitely come now, right at 4 months old. She is not a newborn anymore in any way, but is instead a big, happy, chunky baby.
Napping somewhere other than a person's arms or the swing! With her sleep sheep of course.
Holding that head up big time... and of course slobbering.
Kicking those legs. They haven't stopped moving since 16 weeks gestation :)
Haha... sunglasses and a hat from Gigi and a Bumbo hand-me-down from her cousin Lincoln come together to make this a hilarious picture.
Sitting up! Well, more leaning back. Look at that belly!
And those cheeks!
As usual, I am totally in love.
Have a great and restful Sunday!
Here are some cute pictures of our girl - she is getting SO big lately! I thought that I would feel a big transition at 3 months, but it has definitely come now, right at 4 months old. She is not a newborn anymore in any way, but is instead a big, happy, chunky baby.
Have a great and restful Sunday!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Post-partum Update: 4 months
It is hard to believe that I gave birth to Lydia almost 4 months ago. It is really bizarre, but the whole pregnancy and birth thing (that lasted for more than 9 months) seems so far away now. I was thinking today about how I don't remember what it felt like for her to move inside of me... and it wasn't that long ago! I also feel the details of birth getting fuzzy too - how much it hurt, the emotions that I had, etc.
If you read Lydia's 2 week update you will remember how amazed I was at how quickly I was recovering, and I truly continue to be amazed at how my body is bouncing back. I am within 2-3 pounts of my pre-pregnancy weight by now, and more importantly I am really starting to feel like my old self again. I have energy, an appetite, and it feels great to sweat and get my heart rate up during exercises. Don't get me wrong, things are still a work in progress, but I am way closer than I thought I would be after 3 months.
Diet:
So I am not "dieting", as in restricting what I eat, in any way. However, I wanted to give you an idea of what I eat on a daily basis. I like to read other mommies' stories and ideas on how to stay healthy but also nourished after having a baby. When I had milk supply issues when Lydia was about 2 months old I really had to take a good look at my diet. Mostly, I had to greatly increase the amount I was eating in a day. When school started back up and I had a 3-week-old baby there was very little time for me to fix myself meals, let alone snacks, but I just decided that it would have to be a priority for me. So I added in quite a few good fats, and a lot of extra calories, and I know it sounds crazy, but doing so helped me to drop weight quickly again. As soon as I started eating more, my body began producing more milk, so Lydia ate more everyday, and therefore I burned a lot more calories. You probably hear it all the time, but if you are a nursing momma, take advantage of it! You will never be able to eat like you can when you are nursing.
Here is what I typically eat in a day:
I wake up with a cup of morning coffee and a bowl of cereal. I have switched to 2% milk to incorporate some more fat.
In between breakfast and lunch (usually around 10:30) I will eat a snack. Most of the time this is a granola or protein bar, a Carnation Instant Breakfast, a muffin or some toast with peanut butter. I try to have protein in this snack.
I eat lunch between 12 and 12:30. Lunch varies a lot - I will sometimes have leftovers from dinner or fix myself a baked potato and a salad. Either way, my old cheese, crackers and fruit staple is no longer enough for lunch. If I do just eat cheese, crackers and fruit I will eat a snack of yogurt and almonds an hour and a half later. No matter what I eat, I try to incorporate a fruit and a vegetable (or fruit and yogurt) into this meal.
Sometimes I will have an afternoon snack of yogurt, almonds, or another bowl of Special K. This just depends on how big my lunch was.
David and I eat dinner sometime between 5:30-6:30 most nights and we are always hungry! Dinner varies a bunch, but this is the meal where I have drastically increased my portions. I used to eat half as much as David and now I serve us equal portions. With all of our dinners we have some form of protein and I really try to always have a veggie.
After dinner is where I splurge a little bit - we have eaten ice cream 3 times this week! If it isn't ice cream, I will have some form of a snack around 8. Usually it is a glass of milk with some chocolate syrup.
I know... I eat a lot. But the key for me is to eat often and always have healthy things around to snack on. Some items I would highly recommend incorporating into your diet if you are a nursing mom are: yogurt, 2% milk, cheese, almonds, oatmeal. All of these things are easy to prepare and are really good for helping your body to make good milk!
Nursing:
One day last week I woke up and realized that it didn't hurt to breast feed anymore! It was glorious.
I don't think I realized how painful nursing still was for me. It legitimately hurt for a good 3 months and I think that I just kind of got used to it and decided that it was just supposed to feel that way. But just in the past week or so it has gotten so, so much better. I know a lot of people who had no trouble breastfeeding, and even though my journey has been a "successful" one it has definitely not been easy. So for anyone out there who is having troubles or pains, try to stick with it! It is normal (or at least it happened for me) if you are still hurting after 3 months. I really think that eventually the pain will subside and then it will become so much more enjoyable.
For a while breastfeeding presented me with so many other challenges beside the pain. What can I wear that makes nursing easy? How can I breastfeed in public while being modest? How do I plan my day around this almost full time job?
All of this issues have really become non-issues as of late. Again - breastfeeding is definitely a lifestyle adjustment, but you will get used to it if you stick with it.
Exercising:
Hmm... do I have to write about this??
This is an area where I am definitely still struggling.. a lot. I simply have no free time. I have been writing this blog post for almost 2 weeks now - that is how little free time I have.
I am staying active but I am not doing well at reaching any new fitness goals. I walk every day (as long as it is not raining) for 30 minutes to an hour. My speed is definitely increasing and it feels great to break a sweat as I push Lydia in my awesome jogging stroller and pull my pup along too. I feel that cardiovascularly I am about where I was pre-pregnancy. The area where I am really struggling is strength training. I knew I wouldn't be making it to the gym this semester, but I told myself that I would do pilates, weights and abs at home. That just isn't happening. I know I have a ton going on and I shouldn't really feel guilty.. but I really miss working out in this way. Weights and abs were always my favorite thing to do because it always felt really satisfying to push my body in these ways. Plus, I think that for my body strength training makes the biggest difference in how it looks.
Starting today I plan on trying to do abs at least 4 times a week. They take like 10 minutes! I really should be able to fit in at least this exercise and since my tummy is the only thing I don't currently like about my body abs should take first priority. Once homeworks are over and finals are finished I will worry about the other stuff. In June I start to teach aerobics again (I am so excited!!), so if nothing else that will definitely whip me back into shape.
In general, I feel great about how things are going. I now fit into most of my pre-pregnancy jeans comfortably, although shirts are a different story. There are definitely days when I miss my flat stretch-mark-free stomach (when will they go away??), but anytime I even start to get down about it I look at my beautiful baby girl and her perfectly round belly and am immediately proud again of what my body did. Our bodies are truly amazing and are made to do much more than just look good. I love what having a baby has done for my body image and my appreciation for this gift I have been given.
If you read Lydia's 2 week update you will remember how amazed I was at how quickly I was recovering, and I truly continue to be amazed at how my body is bouncing back. I am within 2-3 pounts of my pre-pregnancy weight by now, and more importantly I am really starting to feel like my old self again. I have energy, an appetite, and it feels great to sweat and get my heart rate up during exercises. Don't get me wrong, things are still a work in progress, but I am way closer than I thought I would be after 3 months.
Diet:
So I am not "dieting", as in restricting what I eat, in any way. However, I wanted to give you an idea of what I eat on a daily basis. I like to read other mommies' stories and ideas on how to stay healthy but also nourished after having a baby. When I had milk supply issues when Lydia was about 2 months old I really had to take a good look at my diet. Mostly, I had to greatly increase the amount I was eating in a day. When school started back up and I had a 3-week-old baby there was very little time for me to fix myself meals, let alone snacks, but I just decided that it would have to be a priority for me. So I added in quite a few good fats, and a lot of extra calories, and I know it sounds crazy, but doing so helped me to drop weight quickly again. As soon as I started eating more, my body began producing more milk, so Lydia ate more everyday, and therefore I burned a lot more calories. You probably hear it all the time, but if you are a nursing momma, take advantage of it! You will never be able to eat like you can when you are nursing.
Here is what I typically eat in a day:
I wake up with a cup of morning coffee and a bowl of cereal. I have switched to 2% milk to incorporate some more fat.
In between breakfast and lunch (usually around 10:30) I will eat a snack. Most of the time this is a granola or protein bar, a Carnation Instant Breakfast, a muffin or some toast with peanut butter. I try to have protein in this snack.
I eat lunch between 12 and 12:30. Lunch varies a lot - I will sometimes have leftovers from dinner or fix myself a baked potato and a salad. Either way, my old cheese, crackers and fruit staple is no longer enough for lunch. If I do just eat cheese, crackers and fruit I will eat a snack of yogurt and almonds an hour and a half later. No matter what I eat, I try to incorporate a fruit and a vegetable (or fruit and yogurt) into this meal.
Sometimes I will have an afternoon snack of yogurt, almonds, or another bowl of Special K. This just depends on how big my lunch was.
David and I eat dinner sometime between 5:30-6:30 most nights and we are always hungry! Dinner varies a bunch, but this is the meal where I have drastically increased my portions. I used to eat half as much as David and now I serve us equal portions. With all of our dinners we have some form of protein and I really try to always have a veggie.
After dinner is where I splurge a little bit - we have eaten ice cream 3 times this week! If it isn't ice cream, I will have some form of a snack around 8. Usually it is a glass of milk with some chocolate syrup.
I know... I eat a lot. But the key for me is to eat often and always have healthy things around to snack on. Some items I would highly recommend incorporating into your diet if you are a nursing mom are: yogurt, 2% milk, cheese, almonds, oatmeal. All of these things are easy to prepare and are really good for helping your body to make good milk!
Nursing:
One day last week I woke up and realized that it didn't hurt to breast feed anymore! It was glorious.
I don't think I realized how painful nursing still was for me. It legitimately hurt for a good 3 months and I think that I just kind of got used to it and decided that it was just supposed to feel that way. But just in the past week or so it has gotten so, so much better. I know a lot of people who had no trouble breastfeeding, and even though my journey has been a "successful" one it has definitely not been easy. So for anyone out there who is having troubles or pains, try to stick with it! It is normal (or at least it happened for me) if you are still hurting after 3 months. I really think that eventually the pain will subside and then it will become so much more enjoyable.
For a while breastfeeding presented me with so many other challenges beside the pain. What can I wear that makes nursing easy? How can I breastfeed in public while being modest? How do I plan my day around this almost full time job?
All of this issues have really become non-issues as of late. Again - breastfeeding is definitely a lifestyle adjustment, but you will get used to it if you stick with it.
Exercising:
Hmm... do I have to write about this??
This is an area where I am definitely still struggling.. a lot. I simply have no free time. I have been writing this blog post for almost 2 weeks now - that is how little free time I have.
I am staying active but I am not doing well at reaching any new fitness goals. I walk every day (as long as it is not raining) for 30 minutes to an hour. My speed is definitely increasing and it feels great to break a sweat as I push Lydia in my awesome jogging stroller and pull my pup along too. I feel that cardiovascularly I am about where I was pre-pregnancy. The area where I am really struggling is strength training. I knew I wouldn't be making it to the gym this semester, but I told myself that I would do pilates, weights and abs at home. That just isn't happening. I know I have a ton going on and I shouldn't really feel guilty.. but I really miss working out in this way. Weights and abs were always my favorite thing to do because it always felt really satisfying to push my body in these ways. Plus, I think that for my body strength training makes the biggest difference in how it looks.
Starting today I plan on trying to do abs at least 4 times a week. They take like 10 minutes! I really should be able to fit in at least this exercise and since my tummy is the only thing I don't currently like about my body abs should take first priority. Once homeworks are over and finals are finished I will worry about the other stuff. In June I start to teach aerobics again (I am so excited!!), so if nothing else that will definitely whip me back into shape.
In general, I feel great about how things are going. I now fit into most of my pre-pregnancy jeans comfortably, although shirts are a different story. There are definitely days when I miss my flat stretch-mark-free stomach (when will they go away??), but anytime I even start to get down about it I look at my beautiful baby girl and her perfectly round belly and am immediately proud again of what my body did. Our bodies are truly amazing and are made to do much more than just look good. I love what having a baby has done for my body image and my appreciation for this gift I have been given.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Seven Snapshots Sunday - Easter Edition
Happy Easter! I hope that you had a wonderful day. Easter is my most favorite holiday... It is so full of hope, joy and anticipation. David and I decided to spend our Easter in Lexington with our small family of three and although we missed being at the big family gatherings in NKY we had a wonderful, relaxing day together.
Lydia's great grandparents in Florida mailed her an adorable dress last week but unfortunately it didn't fit our little peanut just yet. It will be a great summer dress! But in the meantime my mom bought her this precious outfit in Chicago last week. It is 0-3 months and luckily it fit great. After a great church service today we came back home and had a delicious lunch. Then it was time for a photo shoot!
I hope these pictures make you as happy as they make me :)
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Seven Snapshots Sunday
This week I have too many photos to choose from! Lydia really started to sit up a bit this week, so I can get more than just one angle on her now :) Enjoy.
Hands on her knees.
Big girl in her tutu!
This cute hair bow is from her Great Grandma and Pop Pop in Florida.
Love her more than anything.
Cheering on the Cats on Saturday night!
Look at this outfit from her great aunt Jo and cousins. It has shoes... too cute.
She is too big all of the sudden!
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